Alice Whitlock Cullen (
betagainstme) wrote2020-06-26 07:54 pm
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late 1950 //
A few days after a victory with Edward, Alice still has an unsettled feeling in the pit of her stomach.
First, Edward's tiny non-reaction to her visions upon waking up, and second, the weighty knowledge of her lack of knowledge. Of her waking up alone and trying to figure out what comes next. It's been thirty years since that happened but she's never...talked about it with anyone, other than Jasper, who has no idea what it is like.
Waking up, completely changed, completely alone.
She wanders down the hall of the first floor, still learning the layout of the house and searching for Carlisle. Unsurprisingly, she finds him in his office, sitting at his desk. Tapping her fingers against the doorjamb, she gives a little wave. "Hey, Carlisle. Can I come in?"
First, Edward's tiny non-reaction to her visions upon waking up, and second, the weighty knowledge of her lack of knowledge. Of her waking up alone and trying to figure out what comes next. It's been thirty years since that happened but she's never...talked about it with anyone, other than Jasper, who has no idea what it is like.
Waking up, completely changed, completely alone.
She wanders down the hall of the first floor, still learning the layout of the house and searching for Carlisle. Unsurprisingly, she finds him in his office, sitting at his desk. Tapping her fingers against the doorjamb, she gives a little wave. "Hey, Carlisle. Can I come in?"
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She's not sure what she's trying to prove with that one. Or why she wants to win a weirdness contest--she's actually pretty relieved she's not the weirdest of the weird anymore.
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Vampires are graceful creatures, but that doesn't prevent someone like Carlisle feeling awkward at the concept. (Besides, dancing when he was human was for vulgar peasantry, after all.)
Carlisle inhales, then exhales again, thinking. "You are not odd. You're a survivor."
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It suddenly feels heavier. The air, her. Her fingers fiddle at her dress again.
"If only we knew of what," she tries for levity but it feels a little flat as she says it. "I--thank you, Carlisle."
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(He never has managed to learn how to say "You're welcome" with as much grace as he can dance.)
"I regret that I have no clear answers for you. Now - what I can do is try to tell you more about your vision, if you want me to."
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"Yes, please. I mean, if you want to."
Desperate for information? Her? Noooo.
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All true, all perfectly historical.
"They did not approve of my dietary choices."
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She’s focusing on the facts he’s given her, the hazy vision of red eyes and black cloaks forming a little clearer. Opulence and elegance.
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"But they weren't." A pause here, and for all intents and purposes, Carlisle looks like he's looking for something, eyes cast upward and mouth curved on one side. Like investigating a problem.
"They weren't kind. And I was a curiosity, more than anything. At least at the beginning. Then I became an aberration."
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With him? To him? She’s not sure which she’s asking, but she grimaces at the question. Then, shaking her head:
“What did you do?”
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"They wanted me to be like them. When I chose not to, tensions rose to a point where I had to leave. So I escaped. I'll be honest, I'm not entirely sure how I was successful. Maybe I became boring and someone decided to let me go."
Doubtful.
"After I left I think I ran for about a month."
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This man, who was so kind and so good, brought to near madness by these people? And she’s having visions of them?
It’s enough to put her off visiting Italy forever.
“I’m so sorry.” She shakes her head, fingers fiddling with her dress again. “God, Carlisle—“
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It's abrupt, a cross between trying to make Alice feel better and the scientific pragmatism which helps Carlisle navigate so much.
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“Still. You didn’t deserve that, and I’m sorry for bringing it up again.”
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"My life is a lot better than it used to be."
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One--she will be watching for the Volturi and their decisions from now on, knowing a little more about them may make that easier.
Two--she will make sure they do not get their hands on Carlisle again.
Three--Carlisle's future will be steadily watched as well, just in case.
She nods, a smile coming to her lips as she thinks about the rest of Carlisle's family. "Yes, you should be proud of the accomplishments and family you've made with the others. It's a life most don't dream of living, in our situations."
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Alice drifts off, raising an eyebrow as a challenge, a soft smile on her lips.
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"Don't you realize by now that my sage advice is only sage to the family, not to myself?"
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"I hope you'll find the effort worthwhile."
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She's smiling but also...please don't kick her out?
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